I’ve just nicked a plum off my neighbour’s tree. Does that count as looting or a riot? Quick, get the water canons! Call the BBC so that I can be interviewed by ten different reporters all asking and reporting the same thing.
Meanwhile, I watched the first decent vampire flick that I’ve seen in ages. Yes, the Swedes know how to do it. Frostbitten it’s called. Remember, the Swedes also brought us Let the Right One In. If anyone mentions 30 Days of Night to you, laugh in their faces and tell them that they’re talking about a pants Hollywood ‘scenario’ film that never quite develops a plot.
Meanwhile, I think we need another royal wedding to help bind our local communities together and help everyone just calm down.